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From Sodor With Love
It was a beautiful day on the Island of Sodor. The sun was shining, the birds were singing and
the Bond franchise had been forgiven for ‘Die Another Day’.
“What?” asked Percy.
“Oh,
didn’t you hear?” said Edward. “Pierce Brosnan’s the new narrator from Season 11 onwards.”
“Shhh!”
said Henry. “You know we’re not allowed to speculate about Season 11! That’s why Whiff is tied up at the
back of the shed!”
“No, it’s been confirmed,” said Edward. “Pierce Brosnan really is
doing it.”
“And nobody does it better,” added Toby. He looked around. “Sorry, I couldn’t
resist. Oh wait, one more – will the series be retitled ‘Diamond Crossings are Forever?’”
“I
hope Mr Brosnan comes to see us,” said Emily. “He’s a stone-cold hottie.”
“I didn’t
know you were into Pierce Brosnan,” said James.
“I may be an engine, but I am still a woman,” said
Emily primly. "Of course I fancy Pierce Brosnan. Honestly, nobody makes a thing about the fact that Gordon fancies Carol Vorderman.”
“I
do not!” protested Gordon. “I just like Countdown because I’m a fan of word games and numbers and things,
and I had that poster in my cab because I couldn’t find one of any of the other presenters – ”
“Wait,
here’s one!” said Toby. “‘Never Say Trevor Again!’ No, you don’t like that? How about…
‘The World Is Not En-Puff?’ ‘A View to a Bill?’ ‘Casino Royal Train?’”
“I
thought Dalton was a better Bond anyway,” sniffed Henry.
“Are you kidding me?” said James. “Everyone
knows Connery was definitive.”
“Just because he was the first,” said Henry.
“How do
you rate Craig?” asked Edward.
Meanwhile, at the docks…
“Yes! Yes!” said Thomas
to Diesel 10, laughing. “Now the whole world’s going to know that you got scrapped scratching my cylinders!”
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